Couples Therapy for california residents

Couples Therapy That Gets to the Root of Relationship Challenges.

Resolve the Pattern, Not Just the Problem.

Stop Having the Same Fight in Different Ways

When you heal the pattern, you change the relationship

You keep finding yourselves in the same place.

One of you reaches for connection while the other pulls away. The harder one tries, the more the other shuts down. Different arguments. Same painful cycle.

The problem isn't the dishes, the text messages, or the miscommunication. Those are symptoms. Together, we'll uncover what's happening beneath the conflict so you can stop reacting to each other and start feeling understood, connected, and safe again.

A Stronger Relationship Starts Here

The Relationship You Know Is Possible

Healthy relationships aren't built by avoiding conflict—they're built by changing the patterns that create it.

When you identify and heal the root issues beneath recurring arguments, everything begins to shift. Conversations become easier. Trust grows. Emotional closeness returns. You stop feeling like you're on opposite teams and start feeling like partners again.

Together, we'll break the cycles keeping you stuck so your relationship can feel more connected, secure, and fulfilling.

what i help with

I help couples navigate and resolve:

  • Communication problems

    • Constant arguing

    • Feeling unheard or misunderstood

    • Avoidance or emotional shutdown

  • Infidelity and broken trust

    • Affairs (physical or emotional)

    • Lying or betrayal

    • Rebuilding trust after deception

  • Differences in values or future goals

    • Whether to get married

    • Whether to have children

    • Religion, lifestyle differences, career priorities

    • Where to live

    • Long-term compatibility concerns

  • Jealousy and insecurity

    • Attachment anxiety

    • Fear of abandonment

    • Social-media-related jealousy

    • Boundary problems with friends or ex-partners

  • Emotional disconnection

    • Feeling like "roommates"

    • Loss of intimacy or affection

    • Loneliness inside the relationship

    • Feeling emotionally neglected

  • Sexual issues

    • Mismatched libido

    • Lack of sexual satisfaction

    • Avoidance of sex

    • Sexual incompatibility

  • Family or in-law conflict

    • Overinvolvement from parents

    • Loyalty conflicts

    • Cultural expectations

    • Extended-family pressure

  • Recovering from repeated unresolved conflict

    • "We keep having the same fight"

    • Cycles of resentment

    • Accumulated hurt over years

changing relationship patterns

I help couples learn to:

  • Respond rather than react

  • Recognize triggers earlier

  • Increase emotional regulation

  • Feel more grounded during conflict

  • Develop greater safety, presence, and connection

Esma Verma, licensed clinical social worker, smiling in her therapy office
meet your couples therapist

I help couples break the patterns that keep them stuck

Hi, I’m Esma, a holistic therapist. My clients are thoughtful, capable people who are tired of surface-level solutions. They don't want someone to simply listen and nod. They want a therapist who can help them understand what's driving their patterns, and more importantly, help them create lasting change.

My approach is both direct, and nurturing. I won’t shy away from difficult conversations. I’ll help you get beneath the surface and start making real changes. You’ll feel supported and challenged with care and compassion. I believe both are necessary for growth.

Therapeutic Modalities

A Holistic Approach

I don't use just one approach. I pull from multiple modalities based on what the moment calls for.

Brainspotting

Trauma and emotional pain are often stored deeply within the brain and body. Brainspotting is a focused brain-body therapy that helps process unresolved experiences contributing to emotional reactivity, shutdown, anxiety, or relational distress.

Relational Self-Awareness

RSA helps couples understand how attachment patterns, family systems, relational histories, and unconscious beliefs influence the relationship. This work supports greater accountability, differentiation, emotional intimacy, and self-awareness.

Internal Family Systems

IFS works with the “parts” of each of you. The protector who people pleases, the inner critic who won’t shut up, the exile carrying old pain. We get to know them, understand their role and update them to the present. This shifts the focus from blaming each other to understanding personal triggers.

CBT and DBT

Couples develop concrete skills for communication, behavioral change, emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness — particularly for couples navigating high emotional intensity, trauma responses, or chronic conflict cycles.

Somatic Therapy

Relationships are experienced not only emotionally and cognitively, but physically. Somatic therapy helps couples recognize how stress, trauma, and emotional activation live within the nervous system and body.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)

ACT helps couples build psychological flexibility and move toward values-based connection rather than fear-driven or reactive patterns. This work supports emotional presence, acceptance, and intentional action within the relationship.

Therapy That Helps You Move Forward

The End Goal? Needing Therapy Less

The goal of couples therapy isn't to keep you in therapy forever—it's to help you build a relationship that no longer depends on it.

Many couples begin with weekly sessions, then transition to every other week as they experience meaningful progress. Over time, many reach a place where they schedule sessions only as needed, feeling more confident in navigating conflict and reconnecting on their own.

As old patterns begin to change, couples often experience greater trust, healthier communication, deeper emotional intimacy, and a renewed sense of partnership.

Every relationship is different, but the goal is always the same: lasting change that continues long after therapy ends.

The Practical Details

What to Expect

couples therapy - 45 minute sessions

Fee

$325 per session (check below for insurance coverage)

Session Frequency

  • Weekly- Best for couples who want consistent momentum and ongoing support.

  • Every Other Week- Some couples prefer a bi-weekly rhythm that allows time for integration while making therapy more financially manageable.

  • As Needed- Couples may also schedule sessions only when support is needed, typically ranging from 0–3 sessions per month. This option works well for couples who want professional support available without committing to a weekly schedule.

insurance

Most clients with out-of-network benefits get 60–80% reimbursed.

I'm an out-of-network provider. Mentaya automatically submits claims to your insurance after each session, so you don't have to deal with paperwork or submit anything yourself.

Please select "Couples Service" when getting your estimate.

Check Your Coverage →

a different Pace

Where healing gains momentum.

Weekly therapy can be a powerful path to healing. For couples looking for a concentrated experience, Intensive Therapy offers extended time to explore patterns, strengthen connection, and make significant progress together.

Take the First Step

Imagine what becomes possible when old patterns no longer define you.

Your next chapter starts with a conversation